Conversations with my 13 year old...

I am very proud to say that Krystin and I are close...we LOVE to talk.  Not only do we love to talk with spoken word but we recently began a journal called "Just between us" (very cool but yes...it's private so I won't share), this journal journey will be another gateway for communication and sharing between us as she grows.

Some of our conversations are silly and we often end up laughing until we cry.  Some of our conversations are open and honest and we share how we make one another feel sometimes.  Some of our conversations are about boys (yes, my 13 year old TALKS to me about boys).  The list goes on because our conversations are numerous and often sift away into my memory bank.  Others stand out...

Talking to Krystin and "sharing" life with her makes me realize very quickly that my kids face a whole new (and very different) set of challenges than I ever did.  For instance...first day of 8th grade...afterschool I always meet her at cheerleading practice...that day I could immediately read all over her demeanor and expression that something was wrong.  After practice she shares with me that some girl had ruined her day by starting a rumor.  Problem for me as Mommy = this was no "old school" rumor like I used to face.  No, this rumor made me cringe....someone was telling other kids that Krystin was pregnant (remember, this is 8TH GRADE).  Now, if you know my daughter, this will simply make you giggle because she is still the picture of innocence and purity.  But for Krystin, this was devastating and rattled her in a way that I had never seen before.  I wanted so desperately to take away the hurt for her but couldn't...I could only encourage and be there for her.  What's even worse than the hurt though...was the shame that I could see her feeling....and for WHAT?  She hadn't done anything to be ashamed of but yet...she felt it.  Of course we talked about it and even bounced it off another mom and daughter "team" that we love and respect very much (thanks Jill and Paige) and she resolved to turn the other cheek and walk away.  When approached by the girl who started the rumor, she would simply walk away-nothing said.  I encouraged her and reminded her that truth would prevail...she should hold her head high and go on with her life at school.  And then of course, I went to war...in prayer!  Long story short...over the course of the next few days the problem resolved itself through a series of events which ultimately resulted in a change of schedule for Krystin.  I must say...I am very proud of my girl...for standing strong, for walking away and for being the better person.  I am very blessed to be the mother of such an amazing young lady.

On a much lighter note I will share another conversation we had (yesterday as a matter of fact) that made my heart smile.  We were just chatting over a couple of tacos at our favorite little mexican joint when she brought up how lucky she was to have some really great friends in her world.  And she's right, she does.  I told her how God often places people in our "world" when we need them and how we should be thankful for the gifts of friendship like that.  We continued to talk and I told Krystin that she also has to remember that often the people God places in life are to lift her or build her BUT, she must also be attentive to why God placed her in their life.  What role or influence would he have her to play in their world?  I encouraged her to be aware of opportunities to speak life, encourage and be what God has called her to be to THAT person.  Oh yes, that was deep but I saw a light bulb go off in her head and I knew it meant something to her.

So many times in conversations with my 13 year old, I am being "MOM".  I am listening, leading, guiding, teaching and offering advice.  Basically, I am being the grown up.  Underneath that though...she is listening, leading, guiding, teaching and offering advice to me...and she doesn't even know she's doing it.  God is using her to reveal things to me too.  I love being her mom and believe it or not....I don't dread these teenage years at all, why would I?  We are growing, learning and living...TOGETHER!  And what an amazing journey it will be!

Dear Krystin,
Keep up the good work.  You are an amazing young lady and God is going to use you in ways that you cannot even fathom right now.  Dream BIG and go after what God has made you for!  Don't ever forget who you are and WHOSE you are.  You are God's princess...and you are my princess.  You are cherished, you are loved and I will ALWAYS be here for you!  Don't ever stop talking (wink wink)...
Love,
Mommy